Darkness allows us to feel the aura of those around us.
In this set of portraits, I photograph my father in his element.. on his boat at sea… Unfortunately those we love cannot be with us forever, but their memory and their energy will.
Project Type: A Dance in the Dark: series
A set of introspective self portraits depicting the loneliness and doubt associated with the artist’s struggle to make the decision.. Light versus dark, stability versus the unknown, reason versus the emotional and intuitive.
Light allows us to see what is in front of us; darkness allows us to feel the aura of those around us.
Darkness can be perceived as a warm thick blanket which allows us to feel more comfortable and less restrained and self conscious in front of others. It makes us feel anonymous and personal, which in turn makes us more akin to those viewing than when we wear our daytime mask and consciously try to appear more alike to those around us. This soul, or aura is what I am trying to project in my ‘Portraits in the Dark’ series; i.e. the essence of those in front of me.
Sometimes life takes us places we don’t really want to go to, thoughts we don’t really want to face. But we have to. I took these photos in a period I knew that some things weren’t right, and yet I didn’t believe it yet, I couldn’t. I held on to hope and chance just like one would hold on to a prayer, or a last dance in the dark. In dark contrast to this setting of apparent comfort – my stage, my routine, my life.
I’m in a state of big changes and this shows especially at night. I cannot sleep, and when I do, my dreams are very vivid and scary. I wake up every morning feeling tired and lost… what’s happening to me? Will I be a bad mother? Why am I running away all the time? Why am I so scared? – And then apparently it’s normal.
I’ve been going through a difficult pregnancy and have been stuck at home for a while now. Since I am usually a very active, outgoing and sociable person this has been very hard for me.
Although I love being pregnant and ‘interacting’ with baby, I feel as though I’ve lost who I was before, like I’ve lost my spark and my whole outside world has disappeared and only my inside (also inside the house) world exists.
I’ve taken some photos for the A Dance in the Dark series and I guess they represent this melanchonic feeling I cannot seem to shake off.. I’m not sharing these photos with my friends, sometimes it’s easier to share with strangers.
The books represent the readings and attempt at preparation for this new role whereas the casts were made to celebrate my 30th year and various stages of my pregnancy. They also represent various versions of me (if that makes sense!).
I’m going to have to sell my beautiful vintage Volvo P1800E and as a farewell I took a session of Portraits in the Dark with Liza on the driving seat (and my mother babysitting!). I love the contrast between old and new, movement and stability.